Posts Tagged by happy

When asked if they would like to be more happy than they are, the majority of people shout out a resounding yes.

Well, of course, who wouldn’t want to be happier…

But wait. You can only be happier if you know how happy or unhappy you are right now. Most of us are oblivious to our state of well being until we are faced with unwell-being.

So today take some time and ask yourself if you would recognize what makes you happy in the first place, before you consider what you might want instead.

Here are some ideas to help your brain get chewing on this.

Does your job feel like a lead weight? Are you spending your free time on something you love? (do you have free time to spend?) When are you the most content? What parts of your day do you wish would just magical disappear? What brings you joy?

If these questions have stumped you, you’re not alone. Participants at my workshops are often unable to find the answer because the joy has been displaced by work, family and day-to-day demands.

Fear not. Solutions abound.

Try this…set aside a half hour to write out at least three things that have brought you happiness, fun, or joy, and be specific. Saying my kids make me happy isn’t good enough. Saying building sand castles with my kids on a hot summer day at the cottage is specific. Saying losing weight isn’t specific. Saying fitting into my favourite dress comfortably after shedding those last stubborn pounds is specific. Do you feel the difference in these examples? Can you feel the pleasure in the specific ones rather than the standard this should make me happy answers?

Keep at this activities until you can feel it. Allow yourself to remember the full 5 sense experience that brought that happiness into your life.

Are you happy? If not, why not? What would make you happy?

If you’re having a hard time answering this question, you’re not alone.

How do I determine if I am happy or not? At point do I become happy? Is there a universal standard of happiness against which I must be measured? Am I happy relative to others and therefore how do I measure how happy they are?

None of this brain muddle is making me happy….

It is the wrong question. We must ask ourselves instead. How do we become happier?

Happiness is a lifelong pursuit and an ongoing process best thought of as a continuum rather than a finite point. Happiness is an unlimited resource and we must focus on ways of getting more of it.

So what does it mean to be happier?

Well, that’s another post altogether…