Posts Tagged by Be Happier

When the world and your to-do list threaten to overwhelm you, take control with these do anywhere tricks.

  Engage both halves of your brain (improves performance)

-       cross your arms over your body giving yourself a hug

-      this confuses your brain, which is actually a good thing because it forces it to wake up and pay attention thus improving your brain power.

-      make sure to cross the arms over the opposite arm to really shake up the noggin

Calm your brain (helps with focus, concentration, anxiety, fear)

-      place one hand on your belly and one hand on your heart.

-      breathe deeply enough to move your hand on your belly outward

-      exhale deeply enough so your hand comes back in.

-      focus on the movement of your hand on your belly and how your other hand is warmed by your heart

Align your thoughts to positivity (great when you are stuck in traffic)

-      think of the best kiss you’ve ever had – really visualize it, feel it

-      hold this thought in your head

-       you can’t think about something positive and negative at the same time so choose carefully

Ahhh…now, isn’t that better?

               Make a list of what you think would make you happy.

 Does your list look anything like this?

•       A new relationship
•       More flexibility at work
•       A new job with more money
•       An extra bedroom
•       A more attentive spouse
•       A baby
•       Looking younger
•       Relief from your bad back
•       Losing weight
•       Your child doing well in school
•       Cure from an illness or disability

If it does, congratulations you’re normal. These are the most common answers given to the question what would make you happy.

Unfortunately for you, none of these will increase and sustain your happiness level. Everything on this list is circumstantial and humans are very good at adapting to circumstances. Overall these sorts of things only affect your happiness levels by 10%. Piddly stuff.

So what to do?

Consider the characteristics of the happiest people on earth:

•       Devote time to family and friends, nurture and enjoy those relationships
•       Comfortable expressing gratitude
•       First to offer helping hand
•       Practice optimism when imagining their futures
•       Savour life’s pleasures and live in the present moment
•       Make physical exercise a daily habit
•       Deeply committed to lifelong goals & ambitions
•       Have their share of crises, stresses, and tragedies, but use poise and strengths in coping in the face of challenge

All of these entail how you think and what you do. And THAT accounts for 40% of the happiness pie….

Not only will your happiness levels increase, you will be able to better sustain them. How you think and what you do.

If you’ve looked around my blog at all, you’ll know that I am involved with personal development, and work in the field of happiness. I do workshops, lectures, keynotes, represent an amazing wellness company, and all that good stuff. So I’ve been called, on more than one occasion, the happiness lady.

Sigh….

Well, the happiness lady is cranky today. So there. I’m not even going to hide it, I’m just going to lay it out there for you all to see. No need to cringe, the world will not end because you read a negative sentence on blog. Your pristine positive mindset will not crumble.

(Ok, add scathing to the cranky.)

One of the most common questions I get in a workshop or even talking in new business partners, is about the law of attraction and how to handle the ‘bad’ thoughts. If I think bad things, they’ll come true, I’ve made all the bad stuff in my life happen, if I give into to my negative feelings, my life will go to rack and ruin, and so on…

Back up the bus.

 
Let’s get something clear once and for all. If the law of attraction worked like a magic wand, we’d all wave it, have everything we could ever want, and be done with blogs and relationships and networking and all that because it’d be manifested, poof, just like that. Well, sorry, that was never the intent.
Secondly, being a positive person does not equate to being Suzy Sunshine 24/7. Nope, wipe that grin off your face every now and then and get in touch with your real self.
Personal Development, positive psychology, happiness, positive mindset, and blah blah blah, never once said deny the other half of the equation. The gurus do not say you cannot be sad, angry, upset, annoyed, frustrated, and ticked right off.
That’s not real. That’s denial. That’s fake. And we do want authenticity.
The key message in any personal development and wellness lesson is this: What will you do?
Seriously, this is the key. Feel anything and everything, in fact it’s important to allow all feelings not just the wram fuzzy ones; think anything and everything.
Now choose your path. Choose your reaction. Choose your next thoughts, feelings, actions. This is the neglected feature.
So yes, I’m crabby today for a litany of reasons not appropriate for these pages. And I have chosen to acknowledge that, feel that (not super fun, but not agony either), and now it comes to the choice. What do to NEXT…?
Well, I decided to tell this story. I didn’t go yell at my kids, I didn’t slam any doors, I didn’t smash any dishes, and I didn’t pout (much). I decided I would just feel cranky, crabby, and sarcastic. I decided that I could channel this feeling into something productive, a new post. And I decided to forgive myself and allow myself to be human.

Perhaps you can too.